Wedding Day Bloopers - Part 2
If you missed Betsy's hilarious post yesterday, do yourself a favor and head over there to read it first. Friends, true life really can be stranger - and sillier - than fiction! No matter how perfectly we have planned, prepped, and accounted for every single detail - wedding days throw us some serious curve balls. In those moments we just have to grit our teeth, use our heads, figure out and execute solutions on the fly. Efficiency and professionalism are key. No room for error. Long after those moments pass, we laugh. We laugh really, really hard.
I'm sharing two quick stories today, and both are from the same wedding day. Here goes... cue the blooper reel.
Story 1: Wedding Planner Cake Sandwich
Oh goodness, it's hard for me to think about this story without breaking out in hives. To be fair, we did exactly what needed to be done, and we did it perfectly. But it could have gone so very badly, so easily.
Several years ago, we produced a very large wedding that involved a clear-top tent that was used for the reception after dinner ended. Guests were to dine inside the venue and then wander outside to the tent to enjoy the band, dancing, cake, and good times. The weather that day was absolutely perfect. It was June in the south, but it was a pleasant 78-80 degrees. Perfect for an outdoor ceremony in the garden located near the tent.
So here's the problem. Folks, when you use a clear top tent - no matter how much cold air your AC units are pumping into it, if the sun is still overhead, it will be a sweltering greenhouse. As we were setting up that day, the temperatures reached 110 degrees inside the tent. Needless to say, when the five-tier buttercream cake arrived at 2:00 pm, there was no way on God's green earth we were putting that thing in the tent. It would have melted in under 30 seconds!! So we had the baker leave it inside the venue's building and made the call that we would have to move it ourselves after the sun was lower in the sky and the tent cooled down. It was a risky call for sure, but we knew it was the right one.
In order to execute this crazy plan without any guests (or our clients!) knowing about it, we had to utilize the only available window of time to move the cake. During the ceremony. Yep - during the ceremony taking place outside, less than 100 yards from the tent. Betsy and I instructed three of our staff members to walk in front of and beside us to help make sure we didn't trip or misstep. She and I hoisted up that cake and began the journey. I say "journey" because it was SUCH a lengthy distance to travel holding an 80ish pound confectionary structure that could collapse at any moment. Add in the awkwardness of needing to ensure that neither of us touched the cake and it was downright ridiculous. We had to carry the cake with our arms in a painful extended position to avoid an accidental chest bump! I walked backwards and she walked forwards and together we spent about 10 full minutes slowly carrying that heavy thing from a small room inside the property's manor house, through the foyer, down some stairs, across the outdoor patio, around a fountain, down some more stairs, across the lawn, and up a ramp into the tent, to the center of the dance floor. Our arms were shaking from the weight and neither of us could say a single thing or utter even the slightest noise because if even one wedding guest turned their head 45 degrees to the right and saw this crazy scene on the lawn... well, you get the point. It was stressful. And then it was funny. So funny. Because all it would have taken was one small slip for that cake and us to come crashing down, and all 250+ guests would have witnessed both of us fall to the ground to be smothered by cake and buttercream. Like something out of America's Funniest Home Videos. Right smack dab in the middle of the ceremony. So that was the afternoon we narrowly avoided becoming a wedding planner cake sandwich and ruining the bride and groom's cake-cutting memories! Let's not talk about that smudge in the buttercream on the back of the cake that may or may not have come from somebody's boob while she was trying desperately not to touch the cake.
Story 2: Gold Bond Cloud Puff
Later that night, a particular member of our team, whose name starts with a "B" and rhymes with "Etsy", was suffering from the unpleasant effects of a day spent sweating in the sun. I don't care who you are, at some point you've encountered that painful rash that happens when your sweaty skin rubs against itself. It's awful and we all know it too well! Suffice it to say that we are always prepared for anything, so we keep a bottle of Gold Bond talc powder in our kit for soothing relief.
Desperate to find relief for her legs, she opened up the back of her pants and dumped a healthy dose of powder down the back of her legs. I witnessed this craziness with my own eyes, and yes, I was laughing hysterically. Moments later, my laughter turned into full-blown uncontrollable hiccups. As soon as she put the powder away and turned around, I saw that her entire backside was white. There was powder ALL OVER her pants and it was coming through the fabric. Through my hiccups and hysterics, I pointed and told Betsy she was covered in powder. She twisted around to try and see and grabbed at the back of her pant leg and then let it go... what followed can only be described as a cloud of Gold Bond, billowing out from within the fabric of her pants. It was beyond ridiculous and quite the mess. We really are a glamorous bunch, aren't we?!
Enjoy the laughs! Til next time!